Finally making the commitment

One of the big struggles I have in my Christian walk is committing to read my Bible like I should. Sure, I spend time in my Bible weekly. I am doing studies in both my woman's group and my home group but that usually consists of me flipping through the reading and questions the night before or the day of. Where I am really lacking is in my daily reading. Spending that quiet time in the word truly taking it in. I have tried to commit to this several times in my life but like many other ventures I start with a lot of enthusiasm and quickly lose interest and motivation. So when our group leader in woman's bible study brought up the idea of all of us choosing reading plans for this new year, I wasn't in a hurry to get on board. Not because I don't know that I should read, but to be completely honest, I don't really want to. I WANT to want to, but I really don't have that desire. So I completely drug my feet when it came to even looking at reading plans let alone settling on one. Well, being the awesome and persistent leader she is, she again brought it up last week and had everyone share what they chose. I was honest in saying I hadn't chosen one yet and told her I would look into it.

It really forced me to think about why I was so reluctant to do something that I know is right and will be good for me. I thought about it the whole way home and talked about it with my husband later that night. What I realized is that because my desire is lacking, I knew that it would be a lot of work if I wanted to commit to this. And if I was being held accountable by the other women in my group, I would really feel obligated. I ultimately realized that I didn't want to fail like I had so many other times. In order to avoid failure, I have been avoiding making a new commitment to start reading again. I especially didn't want to fail when others would know about it. The thing is, as soon as I recognized this fear and spoke it aloud, I realized that it was silly. That I did not want to be held back by my own fear. Especially not from something that would help me grow spiritually. The more I thought about it the more it became apparent these were the devil's words being whispered in my ear. He was the one telling me I was going to fail. And I let him do it! This was the push I needed to get me going in the right direction. I began to allow new positive thoughts replace the negative ones and no longer was hearing the words failure or fear. I am happy to say that today I have started a 52 week Bible Reading Plan. I am making this commitment to myself and to God. I may not do it perfectly but I am going to do it.

Jeremy's Baptism

Okay, I am SO behind on my blogging! Life finally gets interesting enough to write about and then I don't take the time...go figure:)

A week ago my husband was baptized. What an amazing thing to be able to witness. I have seen this man transform from the stubborn teenager who thought he had everything figured out and didn't need anything from anyone into a man who serves his family in many ways and has humbled himself to accept that his life was not complete without Jesus as an integral part of it. Watching him dive into his new faith has really strengthened mine. Being on this journey together is so much better than it ever could be alone. I am proud of the decision he made to be baptized and am thankful for all the support he had from so many around us. Looking forward to continuing on this amazing journey with him for many years to come.

Submission, Service and...SEX

Yes, I used the word sex in my title! For those of you looking for something graphic, sorry you came to the wrong place. For those of you who turn red faced just reading the word, don't worry I am just talking briefly about the importance of sex in a marriage.

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending a women's conference at my church called Pursue. One component of this conference was a series of workshops in the afternoon. They offered 8 total and we were allowed to choose 2. I was immediately drawn to the Pursuing Your Husband and Pursuing Your Children workshops as wife and mother are the two main roles in my life. I wanted to share with you all what I got out of the husband workshop as I felt it gave me a lot to think and pray about and could be beneficial to other women trying to become better wives.

The first thing we discussed was submission. Why is it important to submit to our husband's? To answer this we dug into God's word. Here is the list of verses we looked at:
Genesis 3:16, Proverbs 21:9, Titus 2:3-5, 1 Corinthians 11:3, 1 Corinthians 11:8-9, Ephesians 5:22, 24; 1 Peter3:1-2. I think that after reading these verses you will see God's clear calling for wives. It is our duty to submit to our husbands, to give him the role as head of the household because this is what is pleasing to God. Is this easy to do? Not for most women. We are raised to be independent and strong and believe we can do it all on our own. And there is nothing wrong with that. But once we are married, we are to give that control over to our husbands. Does that mean we are always going to trust our husband's to make the right decisions? No, but that is where trust in God comes in. Trust that He will guide your husband to lead your household in a way that is pleasing to Him. I urge all of you wives out there to look at your relationship, look at areas where you try to take all the control. Try to let go of just one thing. You will be amazed at how God will begin to use your husband.

The second thing we talked about was service. What does serving your husband look like and why is it important? Once again, we dove right into God's word for this:
Genesis 2:18, Proverbs 31:20, 27; Matthew 20:26-28, Luke 10:27, Romans 15:2, Ephesians 4:29. The simple answer to the question of why we serve our husbands is because in doing so we are serving God. Our pastor often says that those who are considered greatest in the world's eyes are those who HAVE servants while those considered greatest in God's eyes are those who ARE servants. Jesus came here to serve and that is what we are called to do as well. And that starts at home. One thing we were asked to do was to try to do something you don't normally do for your husband, something that will be out of the norm so he knows that you are serving him. This may be something as simple as taking out the trash so that he has time to relax or do something else.

Finally we get to the juiciest of the s words...sex. So often Christian women are taught to feel dirty about sex. We focus so much on why it is wrong before marriage that we forget to focus on why it is important after marriage. Men are sexual creatures, this is how they experience intimacy. If we as wives are not meeting these sexual needs, they will find other ways to meet them. Here are some verses that touch on what God says about sex:
Genesis 1:28, Genesis 2:24, Proverbs 5:19, Song of Songs 7:10, 1 Corinthians 7:2-5, 9; Ephesians 5:24, Hebrews 13:4. Here God talks about how our bodies are not just ours alone but also our husband's and how we are not to deprive them of it. It is our job to protect our husbands from the temptations that they encounter each day. If they are having their needs met at home, these temptations won't be nearly as powerful. So before your husband heads off for a business trip or a hunting trip or a day at a water park (hello, half-naked women) make sure that he is taken care of. I think often we as women put sex at the bottom of our list of things to do. There is just so much more going on in a day. But I think the more you read God's word and pray about it you will realize not only how important it is to your husband but also to your marriage. And when you also realize that this is a gift that God has given us to enjoy with our spouse, it becomes that much more special.

I know that I took a lot away from this and I am continuing to spend time in God's word and praying so that I can do a better job of being the wife God wants me to be and my husband deserves to have. All of these are areas that I need work in and I am slowly making an effort to put myself aside and make room for what God has in store for me. I am already seeing the fruit of this as I submit myself to God's amazing design for me as a wife.

Discernment vs. Condemnation

One of the mommy sites I am on has a number of groups that you can participate in, post questions, thoughts, start debates. Needless to say it can get heated. And whether in a Christian or non-Christian group, the question of judgement often gets brought up. So I thought that I would spend some time trying to find out what the Bible says about judgement. What I have found says that there is a difference between judgement and discernment. I think this was educational to me because while I have always thought it wrong to judge, I have found it to be pretty near impossible. Now realizing there is a difference between judging and discernment, I feel like I have a better idea of what God is asking of us in this area. Please feel free to add any knowledge you have on this topic, as I have just stared looking into it and would like to know as much as I can. This is what I read about it on www.livinghopeofgod.org :


Discernment

The following Greek verbs describe the scope and action of discernment:
dokimazo = to test, to examine; to interpret, to discover; to approve; to prove, to demonstrateanakrino = to ask questions, to examine; to evaluate, to scrutinize, to investigate; to search outdiakrino = to make a distinction (between persons); to weigh thoroughly each partpeirazo = to assay, to examine; to prove, to try

Judgment
This Greek verb is used in Scripture to describe the scope and action of judgment:
krino = to pass judgment on, to sentence; to mentally or judicially condemn; to conclude, to decide, to determine



Six Basic Indications that Expose a Judgmental Spirit
1. If his failure improves the opinion I have of myself, I am judging.

2. If his failure decreases my concern for the faults I know I have, I am judging.

3. If his failure gives me a desire to see that he is punished, I am judging.

4. If I am eager to tell others about his failure, I am judging.

5. If his failure prompts me to review his past failures, I am judging.

6. If his failure causes me to feel that I cannot forgive him, I am judging



Six Basic Factors of Discernment vs. Judgmental Spirit
1. One who discern will thoroughly examine himself before evaluating the actions of others.(Galatians 6:4; 1 Corinthians 11:28, 31; 2 Corinthians 13:5)
2. One who discerns will check the accuracy of all facts and related factors before reaching a conclusion.(1 Corinthians 2:15; 1 Thessalonians 5:21; 1 John 4:1)
3. One who discerns will deal as privately as possible with the problems he sees.(1 Corinthians 6:5-6)
4. One who judges will condemn others for their visible problems but fail to realize that their attitudes stem from root problems which he himself has not yet overcome.(Romans 2:1; 14:10)
5. One who judges will form opinions on first impressions or hearsay, and then he will look for evidence to confirm his opinions, even though, the evidence may be out of context.(John 7:24, 51; James 4:11)
6. One who judges will publicly expose those whom he condemns. This may cause others to condemn him for having the same root problem such as pride, lack of love, or a critical spirit.(Luke 6:37)
A discerning Christian is one detects a fault in another and is able to give clear direction for victory based on the principles of God’s Word and his own application of them. On this basis he is able to restore an offending brother rather than reject him. (See Galatians 6:1)

Live and love with purpose

While I was sitting in the quiet of my house making invitations for my sons second birthday party, God impressed on me a thought that I felt compelled to share with you all. I want to begin by asking if you love what you do? The job you have, whether it be fireman, grocery checker, school principal, or stay at home mom…do you love it? I knew from very young that I wanted to be a wife and a mom. No matter what other things I aspired to be when I grew up, those were two that never changed. In fact, before I left for college I informed my mom that I was only going there until I met my rich husband and then I wouldn’t need to finish school because I would be a full time wife and mom. Well, I did meet my husband and still finished school. And while by no standards rich, he worked hard at what he does to get us to a place where I can stay home to be the wife and mom I want to be. Is it everything I thought it would be? No way!! Sometimes I wonder what I was thinking but it also brings me joy in ways I never could have imagined. Do I love it? Not always but I can’t fathom anything that I would love more. So my next question is whatever it is you do and whether you love it or not, do you make the most of it? Do you wake up each day thinking I am going to do my best at what I do today and I am going to find joy in it where I can? I can guess that many would say no. I would have to say no myself. I am ashamed by how much I take what I have for granted. So many moms would kill to be in my shoes and I often don’t appreciate it for what it’s worth. I don’t make the most of my time with my kids. My house is by no means spick and span most of the time. My husband doesn’t have his every need met. All things I thought I would be doing if I was staying home. Of course life gets in the way and nothing is ever going to be perfect but if I continue to be honest I can say that most of it is lack of effort on my part. Laziness. An ungratefulness for what I have been given in my life and why I have been given it. Do you realize that you are who you are and where you are for a purpose? God created you to be the age you are right now for a reason. You live where you do, have the family and friends you do, attend the church you do and yes, have the job you do for a purpose. Now some of you might be thinking, “Well, thanks a lot God. What did I ever do to you!” But if you really stop and think about it, it’s amazing. You are that special that everything you are was predestined in a way that would serve God. When I think of it in that way, I truly feel ashamed by the way I waste my blessings. How can I not get up each day and try to be the best wife and mother I can? How can I not find joy in all I do when it has been given to me by God? What a humbling thought. As I pray on this for myself tonight, I just ask all of you reading this to look at where you are in your life and ask yourself if you are living like it’s a gift from God. Does everything you do at work and home display your gratefulness for all you have been given? Do you live like you have a purpose?

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:1).

Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully (Romans 12:4-8).

Our first small group!!

Feeling extremely blessed this morning as God continues to answer our prayers in big ways. For so long we have been longing to be part of a church family and after Jeremy's shift restructuring at work we were able to start attending Real Life Ministries. We have just loved the time we have spent there. We have been praying for a long time to get into an active church where we can begin to meet other couples and families who we would have something in common with. Our church is so large that they rely on small groups to keep everyone connected. One of the first times Jeremy went to the men's breakfast he got hooked up with a guy who was starting a new home group in our area. It happens to be a couples group and they all have kids. Yesterday was the start of the new year so we all got together for a BBQ to get to know each other. It was a really great time and it is getting me so excited for weekly fellowship with these other couples. Another prayer I have had (you can look back several blogs:) was to become more versed in my faith. To dig deeper into the word and be able to speak it from memory and a place of understanding. I found out last night that the way this group works is that we break down a book in the bible and take turns weekly memorizing a story from that book and reciting it back to the group without taking anything away or adding anything to the word. We then reconstruct the story as a group, read it from the bible to see if we added or took anything away, and then discuss what we learned about God and man in the story. Talk about truly learning my Bible!! I didn't think this would happen in such a public fashion, but I have learned that when you ask God for something you had better be prepared because you never know the form in which it will come:)

"Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus, so that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God." Romans 15:5-7