A fresh start

As we get ready to head off to buy school supplies for the boys, I can't help but reminisce about my school days. I always loved that time at the end of summer when we went off to pick up all of our new school supplies for the year. Whether it was elementary school when I was organizing my pencil box or high school when I was making a folder for each class and putting clean sheets of notebook paper into my 3-ring binder, it always gave me a little rush. Some of you may be whispering screaming NERD and maybe there is some truth in that but I think it speaks for my optimistic side. New school supplies always meant new school year which meant new beginnings. A chance to start fresh, to have a clean slate. I would always resolve to make this the year that I stayed on top of everything. Then there was the possibility of new friendships and new crushes *swoon*. And of course new clothes were like the cherry on top of the sundae.

I wrote yesterday how Nathan had my same crazy love for school supplies. He has yet to actually experience school so I know they don't hold the same meaning for him yet but I can just see that he too will be a nerd optimist when it comes to school. I hope that each year will be full of excitement for the possibilities it brings and that he takes the opportunity to embrace each new beginning. Watching them grow can be hard it times but I love how it brings me right back to that time in my life. It lets me linger for awhile in a place that is long gone. It is that gift of seeing the pieces of myself that live on in my children. 


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A smell, a taste, a sound

Yesterday as my 3 little men were napping and I was doing some catching up on the computer, I overheard my husband watching an episode of Band of Brothers. The men were singing the song "Glory, glory, what a hell of a way to die" and I found myself in a different place for just a moment. No, it was not World War II. That song had triggered a memory of my grandfather who used to sing military songs to us. I could see a moment in the living room with him and my brother, I could feel what I felt at that moment, I could almost smell my grandparents house. It is amazing how our memory gives us those small gifts.

All of my grandparents have passed and I treasure these moments where I am taken back to a time when they were still alive. Sometimes it is a song like yesterday. Sometimes it is the smell of something cooking that reminds me of my grandma's kitchen. I have even been brought back by the smell of Oil of Olay as that was what my one grandmother always smelled like. A phrase or gesture can  trigger this time warp. All of my grandparents had qualities that were distinctly them and when they reappear in a different form I am instantly reminded of them. It makes me wonder what kind of things will trigger someone's memory of me when I am gone. Will my husband smell someone else wearing my favorite Bath and Body scent and think of me? Will my kids be at a park with their kids and be brought back to a time when we frequented the park? In someway it is comforting to know that these pieces of me will continue on.

I am so grateful that those we have lost can still live on in our memory. It is like an appetizer...something to tide you over until we have the real thing again one day.

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